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  • Jacob Have I Loved

    But Esau I have hated, 'cause he didn't send me flowers. Dumb jerk.What a pathetic, shameful excuse for a holiday.Ok, ok... before I get a slew of hopeless romantics who wish to stone me for slaying Aphrodite and all tha…

  • Give Me Five Minutes

    I'll tell you how to change your life. I could easily sit here and instruct you on good eating habits (they never really exist), on staying clean of drugs (something we spend years neglecting in school), on excersize a…

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